This is going to be a personal post. I have written about my own weight over the last 10-15 years. I have deliberately chosen not to write how many kg I weighed, since I think it is very individual. Moreover, a number can easily be used to compare, and that is not my intention with this blog.
I thought you had an eating disorder
I have always been very skinny and have been able to eat a lot without it showing on the stomach or on the scale. I should mention that I have always eaten a healthy and varied diet and been eating very intuitively, stopped eating when I was no longer hungry and ate what I wanted.
When I was in my early 20 and up until I was about 27, I had periods where I had difficulty keeping the weight up. I remember when I started my Bachelor in Health and Nutrition that several from my class thought I had an eating disorder. This was until they came to know me and saw the amount of food I ate. Specifically in stressful periods, I had a hard time keeping my weight up. I had to add more calories to my diet to keep the weight, which as well can be a challenge.
My weight gain
When I was about 27, I had a clinical depression and got antidepressant. Those who have tried this also know that you do not necessarily get the right medicine (regarding brand and doses) the first time. Over a period of three months, I gained almost 20 kilo do to the medicine. You could almost see me growing. After consultation with my doctor, we decided to change my medicine once again. After that, my weight stagnated. The weight gain was something I had to get used to both physically and mentally. In three months, I went from being normal-weight at the low end of the scale to being overweight, which I experienced as a massive change.
My new look
People I knew were very flabbergasted of how I looked. I myself was too, I could not figure out how to dress for my new shape. It was as if my head could not really understand it. I have experienced the same with clients who have lost weight that if it has gone too fast, it is difficult to follow mentally. Because of that, I always recommend a slow weight loss or weight gain. My experience is that it is healthier both physically and mentally.
After some time, I learned not to stress over the extra pounds. I had other things to think about, amongst getting completely well, my education. Moreover, a year after I met my husband.
The body changes during pregnancy
The years went by; meanwhile I completed two educations, got pregnant, married and moved to Switzerland where I gave birth to my daughter, our first child. It was almost six years ago. I gained 15 kg during the pregnancy, which I lost quickly after the birth, including a few more pounds. I ended up weighing less than I did before my pregnancy.
After my second pregnancy I lost the pregnancy weight quickly again. This time the weight loss continued. I got a step counter and challenged myself, it worked amazingly for me. At that time, I had a stable weight, which was 6-7 kg above the weight I had in my early twenties.
Later on, I was diagnosed with a vitamin B12 deficiency you can read about this here. In order to make a long story short, I had a feeling that I ate something on a daily basis that was not good for my body. I ended up doing an elimination diet and concluded that I feel better when I do not eat milk and gluten. After having removed this from my diet, I lost another couple of pounds. I am not down at weighing what I weight when I was the thinnest. However, I have also had two children and I am 10 years older. The last 6 months I have had a stable weight, and I feel really good in and with my body.
What other think
Both; when I weighed “too” much and “too” little, in connection with my weight gain and my weight loss, I have experienced many different opinions, prejudices and attitudes. What I found, and what I also teach my clients, is that you are the Boss over your body. It is you who knows when you feel the best, when you feel heavy or when it has become too much and you lack energy.
For me, it is about the balance. We are all different, we all have our good and bad sides, we all have good and bad habits. In addition, it is both, okay to change habits, lifestyle or something completely third, but it is also ok to rest in itself and be satisfied wherever and however you are. For some, it is also about finding peace with who they are and how they look.
What is your motivation for a lifestyle change?
I have tried to feel too fat and too skinny. What made me try to change these “sizes” was the feeling I had in and with my body. Being in a place health wise where I feel good is no matter what the emphasis is or what others say / think the most important.
Do you have any dietary habits you would like to change? Do you need help finding peace with your body? Is your goal losing weight? Or gain weight? If you need help with this, and if I am the right one to help you, then you can read about my programs here.
Thank you for reading!